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AN INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER BE NO MAN'S PEACE. Have you ever been badgered by an annoying pick-up artist at the bar? Ever felt a burning desire to emotionally torture a friend’s boyfriend in an act of revenge? Have you ever endured just talking to a man before? If so, then this book is for you. With more than 100 phrases, questions, and comebacks, How to Piss Off Men is your essential guide to sending even the most relentless mansplainer into an existential crisis. Whether it’s referring to his expensive NFL jersey as “cosplay” or letting him know he has the confidence of a much taller man, this handbook will ensure you’re equipped to combat toxic masculinity in any situation.* * The advice in this book has been thoroughly tested for effectiveness. Even on the author, bless his heart. |
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The New York Times bestselling reinterpretation of the Ten Commandments from the larger, louder half of the world-famous magic duo Penn & Teller. A scathingly funny reinterpretation of the Ten Commandments from the larger, louder half of world-famous magic duo Penn and Teller reveals an atheist's experience in the world: from performing on the Vegas strip with Siegfried and Roy to children and fatherhood to his ongoing dialogue with proselytizers of the Christian Right and the joys of sex while scuba-diving, Penn has an outrageous sense of humor and a brilliantly entertaining opinion on, well, anything you care to think of. |
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From New Yorker and Onion writer and comedian Blythe Roberson, How to Date Men When You Hate Men is a comedy philosophy book aimed at interrogating what it means to date men within the trappings of modern society. Blythe Roberson’s sharp observational humor is met by her open-hearted willingness to revel in the ugliest warts and shimmering highs of choosing to live our lives amongst other humans. She collects her crushes like ill cared-for pets, skewers her own suspect decisions, and assures readers that any date you can mess up, she can top tenfold. And really, was that date even a date in the first place? With sections like Real Interviews With Men About Whether Or Not It Was A Date; Good Flirts That Work; Bad Flirts That Do Not Work; and Definitive Proof That Tom Hanks Is The Villain Of You’ve Got Mail, How to Date Men When You Hate Men is a one stop shop for dating advice when you love men but don't like them. "With biting wit, Roberson explores the dynamics of heterosexual dating in the age of #MeToo" — The New York Times |
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Garfield is a fast-talking, late-sleeping, cynical, lovable cat. He hassles Odie, Jon, and Nermal and enchants kids of all ages. And now he's back—better, fatter, and funnier than ever before! |
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Garfield, bon vivant of cats, lazy, sassy, grouchy, and downright delightful, is back with an all-star cast: Jon , his owner; Liz , the veterinarian; Irma , the waitress; Lyman , Jon's friend; Odie , just a dog; Nermal , a cute kitten; and Pooky , Garfield's very own teddy bear. Together again, they're in Garfield's world now, and what he says goes—for everyone. |
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This 34th annual edition of Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader offers an all-new collection of fascinating trivia, strange-but-true oddities, and the ever-popular stories of dumb crooks! Uncle John’s Hindsight Is 2020 Bathroom Reader  is packed with tons of new articles from the worlds of pop culture, history, and science to help you get everything out of your system the next time you visit the throne room! Articles range in length from a single page to extended page-turners, each as entertaining as the last. From iconic television roles that almost weren’t to the origins of comic books, this 34th edition of fascinating trivia, hilarious lists, and notable quotes compiled by Uncle John and his team at the Bathroom Readers’ Institute will set your mind free to roam the world—and you won’t even need to leave the house! |
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Uncle John is back with the 36th annual Bathroom Reader, an all-new collection of entertaining articles that explore the weird and wonderful world we live in. In this 36th edition of  Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader , longtime fans and new readers alike will be astounded by a treasure trove of wonderfully weird (and true!) stories that explore the realms of pop culture, history, sports, science, and everyday folks, including the always popular misadventures of dumb crooks. Uncle John and his team at the Bathroom Readers’ Institute have reached into all corners of the world to bring you this all-new collection of entertaining and informative articles that include short reads for a quick trip to the throne room as well as longer page-turners for when you take an extended visit. You’ll also find a plethora of amusing lists, odd factoids, quotes, and quizzes that will tickle every trivia enthusiast’s fancy.   |
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*From the star of CUNK ON EARTH - BBC's landmark mockumentary, now on Netflix!* 'This book is great because it covers everything in existence apart from the 95% of stuff not worth bothering with' Philomena Cunk, star of Charlie Brooker's Weekly Wipe, Moments of Wonder and Cunk on Earth, Cunk & Other Humans 'Essential reading for these slipshod times' Al Murray Once in a blue moon, a book comes along that changes the world. The Origin of Species. War and Peace. 1984. The World According to Danny Dyer. And now, Cunk on Everything: The Encyclopedia Philomena , by Philomena Cunk. Philomena Cunk is one of the greatest thinkers of the 21st century, and in Cunk on Everything she turns her attention to our biggest issue: why are there so many books? Wouldn't it be better if there was just one? This is that book - an encyclopedia of ALL HUMAN KNOWLEDGE , from sausages to Henry of Eight to Brush Strokes to vegetarian sausages. Read it, and you'll never have to read another book again. 'This is a book' Philomena Cunk 'Never contact me again' Professor Rupert Delgado, MBE 'Cunk for PM' Rachel Riley '. . . book . . .' Guardian ' Truly the intellect for our baffling times' The Times 'This book is absolutely stupid' The Pool |
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A touching and hilarious gift book of poetry and prose on the subject of children and Christmas from the Yorkshire school inspector and bestselling author of the Dales series and Little Village School series. |
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New York Times Bestseller "There is no writer quite like Dolly Alderton working today and very soon the world will know it.” —Lisa Taddeo, author of #1 New York Times bestseller Three Women “Dolly Alderton has always been a sparkling Roman candle of talent. She is funny, smart, and explosively engaged in the wonders and weirdness of the world. But what makes this memoir more than mere entertainment is the mature and sophisticated evolution that Alderton describes in these pages. It’s a beautifully told journey and a thoughtful, important book. I loved it.” —Elizabeth Gilbert, New York Times bestselling author of Eat, Pray, Love and City of Girls The wildly funny, occasionally heartbreaking internationally bestselling memoir about growing up, growing older, and learning to navigate friendships, jobs, loss, and love along the ride When it comes to the trials and triumphs of becoming an adult, journalist and former Sunday Times columnist Dolly Alderton has seen and tried it all. In her memoir, she vividly recounts falling in love, finding a job, getting drunk, getting dumped, realizing that Ivan from the corner shop might just be the only reliable man in her life, and that absolutely no one can ever compare to her best girlfriends. Everything I Know About Love is about bad dates, good friends and—above all else— realizing that you are enough. Glittering with wit and insight, heart and humor, Dolly Alderton’s unforgettable debut weaves together personal stories, satirical observations, a series of lists, recipes, and other vignettes that will strike a chord of recognition with women of every age—making you want to pick up the phone and tell your best friends all about it. Like Bridget Jones’ Diary but all true, Everything I Know About Love is about the struggles of early adulthood in all its terrifying and hopeful uncertainty. |
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Spirited and whip-smart, these laugh-out-loud autobiographical essays are "a masterpiece" from the Emmy Award-winning actress and comedy writer known for 30 Rock, Mean Girls, and SNL" ( Sunday Telegraph ). Before Liz Lemon, before "Weekend Update," before "Sarah Palin," Tina Fey was just a young girl with a dream: a recurring stress dream that she was being chased through a local airport by her middle-school gym teacher. She also had a dream that one day she would be a comedian on TV. She has seen both these dreams come true. At last, Tina Fey's story can be told. From her youthful days as a vicious nerd to her tour of duty on Saturday Night Live ; from her passionately halfhearted pursuit of physical beauty to her life as a mother eating things off the floor; from her one-sided college romance to her nearly fatal honeymoon -- from the beginning of this paragraph to this final sentence. Tina Fey reveals all, and proves what we've always suspected: you're no one until someone calls you bossy. Includes Special, Never-Before-Solicited Opinions on Breastfeeding, Princesses, Photoshop, the Electoral Process, and Italian Rum Cake! |
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“Fahmy uses humor to work through stereotypes and tell stories about nuanced hijabi characters.” — The Washington Post Popular Instagram cartoonist and Muslim-American Huda Fahmy presents a hilarious, relatable, and painfully honest new collection of comics that break down barriers and show how universal our everyday problems, worries, and joys actually are. At some point in our lives, we’ve all felt a little out of place. Huda Fahmy has found it’s a little more difficult to fade into the crowd when wearing a hijab. In Yes, I’m Hot in This , Huda navigates the sometimes-rocky waters of life from the unique perspective of a Muslim-American woman, breaking down misconceptions of her culture one comic at a time. From recounting the many questions she gets about her hijab every day (yes, she does have hair) and explaining how she runs in an abaya (just fine, thank you) to dealing with misconceptions about Muslims, Yes, I’m Hot in This tackles universal feelings from an point of view we don’t hear from nearly enough. Every one of us have experienced love, misunderstanding, anger, and a deep desire for pizza. In Yes, I’m Hot in This, Huda’s clever comics demonstrate humor’s ability to bring us together, no matter how different we may appear on the surface. |
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David Sedaris returns with his most deeply personal and darkly hilarious book. If you've ever laughed your way through David Sedaris's cheerfully misanthropic stories, you might think you know what you're getting with Calypso. You'd be wrong. When he buys a beach house on the Carolina coast, Sedaris envisions long, relaxing vacations spent playing board games and lounging in the sun with those he loves most. And life at the Sea Section, as he names the vacation home, is exactly as idyllic as he imagined, except for one tiny, vexing realization: it's impossible to take a vacation from yourself. With Calypso, Sedaris sets his formidable powers of observation toward middle age and mortality. Make no mistake: these stories are very, very funny--it's a book that can make you laugh 'til you snort, the way only family can. Sedaris's powers of observation have never been sharper, and his ability to shock readers into laughter unparalleled. But much of the comedy here is born out of that vertiginous moment when your own body betrays you and you realize that the story of your life is made up of more past than future. This is beach reading for people who detest beaches, required reading for those who loathe small talk and love a good tumor joke. Calypso is simultaneously Sedaris's darkest and warmest book yet--and it just might be his very best. |
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For ten years, listeners of The Vinyl Cafe have shared their personal stories with Stuart McLean on The Vinyl Cafe Story Exchange. To celebrate the tenth anniversary of the segment, Stuart and his long-time radio producer, Jess Milton, have collected their favourites. The result is a wise, wonderful anthology of stories about rituals and romance, road trips and guitar licks, Saturday-night hockey games and Sunday morning pancakes. A story about an exploding outhouse sits right beside one about a lost love because that's just what happens in life. Sad things are all tangled up with funny things and sweet things, too. |
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Nutty Fun! What kind of house does Garfield live in? A nuthouse, of course! The Arbuckle home is located just around the bend, where Jon and his wacky pets display their mad skills for having fun! Experience the zaniness with this all-new collection of quirky comics! |
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Qui a besoin d'un guide de politesse? Pas vous. Mais peut-être votre voisine bruyante, votre collègue envahissant ou cet usager du métro qui prend beaucoup de place. Parce que ce n'est jamais nous qui manquons de savoir-vivre. À moins que… Stéphanie Neveu, Montréalaise de naissance, et Laurent Turcot, originaire de Québec, s'amusent à décortiquer avec humour une journée typique dans la métropole québécoise. Cette compilation irrévérencieuse des manières de vivre et d'agir pourrait bien faire mouche. «Basé sur de réelles anecdotes de l'entourage des auteurs, Vivre et survivre à Montréal au 21e siècle vous fera rire, certes, mais vous remplira aussi de fierté. Parce qu'aussi malcommode qu'elle peut parfois paraitre, Montréal, c'est notre ville à nous et nous ne l'échangerions pour rien au monde.» - Extrait de la préface d'Alexandre Taillefer Diplômée en communications profil journalisme à l'UQAM, Stéphanie Neveu a touché à tout, que ce soit dans l'édition, les relations de presse, la chronique musicale et les télécommunications. Longtemps, elle a tenu un blogue sous le nom de Fanny Ardente, mais, à la rencontre de Laurent, sa folle vie onirique a basculé dans la vie rêvée des gens heureux. Laurent Turcot est titulaire de la Chaire de recherche du Canada en histoire des loisirs et des divertissements. Professeur en histoire à l'UQTR, il a été consultant historique sur le jeu d'Ubisoft Assassin's Creed Unity qui se déroule à Paris pendant la Révolution française. |
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When the Scots tell a joke it's usually at their own expense. So this collection of gems pokes fun at just about everyone and everything from kilts and haggis through footie and thriftiness to Sassenachs, Teeries, and Glaswegians. Some of the jokes are old favourites retold, some are brand new, and some are a few specimens found on that internet thingy which have been massaged to make them almost funny. |
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An irreverent romp through Scottish proverbs with chapters ranging from Old Scottish Proverbs Revamped and Modern Scottish Proverbs, through Scottish Chat-Up Lines and Scottish Insults to Glaswegian Proverbs. Not to be taken seriously in any way! |
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History that doesn't suck: Smart, crude, and hilariously relevant to modern life. Those who don't know history are doomed to repeat it. Too bad it's usually boring as sh*t. Enter The Captain, the ultimate storyteller who brings history to life (and to your life) in this hilarious, intelligent, brutally honest, and crude compendium to events that happened before any of us were born. The entries in this compulsively readable book bridge past and present with topics like getting ghosted, handling haters, and why dog owners rule (sorry, cat people). Along the way you'll get a glimpse of Edith Wharton's sex life, dating rituals in Ancient Greece, catfishing in 500 BC, medieval flirting techniques, and squad goals from Catherine the Great. You'll learn why losing yourself in a relationship will make you crazy--like Joanna of Castile, who went from accomplished badass to Joanna the Mad after obsessing over a guy known as Philip the Handsome. You'll discover how Resting Bitch Face has been embraced throughout history (so wear it proudly). And you'll see why it's never a good idea to f*ck with powerful women--from pirate queens to diehard suffragettes to Cleo-f*cking-patra. People in the past were just like us--so learn from life's losers and emulate the badasses. The Captain shows you how. |
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Maybe Jesus was joking, the disciples didn't know what they were doing and the New Testament is a lot funnier than you might think. You would think it weird if someone suddenly ascended into heaven, right? Reading between the lines, do we detect a touch of rivalry between Peter and John? And surely the lack of parables in the latter's mystical tome is simply crying out to be redressed . . . In this sparklingly witty book, BBC sitcom writer James Cary gives us a new and liberating way of looking at the gospel as he entertainingly relates it to a modern context, with references ranging from Charles Dickens to The Vicar of Dibley . Cheerfully playing around with the text, he takes the Bible seriously but allows us to laugh at our own petty vanities and foibles - and be enlightened in the process. The Gospel According to a Sitcom Writer is ideal for anyone wanting to liven up their Bible reading and looking for new ways to be thrilled by this sacred text. It's also perfect for priests, pastors, youth leaders and all those involved in ministry and giving sermons, as James Cary shows using comedy and humour is a brilliant way to communicate the gospel. Warm, funny and full of brilliant insight and Christian humour, The Gospel According to a Sitcom Writer will make you laugh out loud and shake your head in awe. You'll never read the Bible the same way again. |
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Publishers Weekly  Best Summer Reads  Overturn everything you knew about history’s greatest minds in this raucous and hilarious book, where it turns out there's a finer line between "genius" and "idiot" than we've previously known. “As Albert Einstein almost certainly never said, everyone is a genius – but if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” So begins Katie Spalding’s spunky takedown of the Western canon, and how genius may not be as irrefutably great as we commonly understand. While most of us may never become Einstein, it may surprise you to learn that there’s probably a bunch of stuff you can do that Einstein couldn’t. And, as Spalding shows, the famous prodigies she explores here were quite odd by any definition. For example:   Thomas Edison , inventor of the lightbulb, believed that he could communicate with the undead and built the world’s very first hotline to heaven: the Spirit Phone. Marie and Pierre Curie , famous for discovering radioactivity, slept next to a lump of radioactive material for years and strapped it to their arms to watch it burn them in real-time. Lord Byron , acclaimed British poet, literally took a bear with him to university. Isaac Newton discovered the laws of gravity and motion, but he also looked up at the sun without eye protection. The result? Three days of blindness. Tesla , whose scientific work led to the invention of the AC unit, fell in love with a pigeon. Edison's Ghosts is filled with examples of the so-called best of humanity doing, to put it bluntly, some really dumb shit.  You’ll discover stories that deserve to be told but never are: the hilarious, regrettable, and downright bafflingly lesser-known achievements that never made it into our history books, until now. |
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Spirited and whip-smart, these laugh-out-loud autobiographical essays are "a masterpiece" from the Emmy Award-winning actress and comedy writer known for 30 Rock, Mean Girls, and SNL" ( Sunday Telegraph ). Before Liz Lemon, before "Weekend Update," before "Sarah Palin," Tina Fey was just a young girl with a dream: a recurring stress dream that she was being chased through a local airport by her middle-school gym teacher. She also had a dream that one day she would be a comedian on TV. She has seen both these dreams come true. At last, Tina Fey's story can be told. From her youthful days as a vicious nerd to her tour of duty on Saturday Night Live ; from her passionately halfhearted pursuit of physical beauty to her life as a mother eating things off the floor; from her one-sided college romance to her nearly fatal honeymoon -- from the beginning of this paragraph to this final sentence. Tina Fey reveals all, and proves what we've always suspected: you're no one until someone calls you bossy. Includes Special, Never-Before-Solicited Opinions on Breastfeeding, Princesses, Photoshop, the Electoral Process, and Italian Rum Cake! |
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I've experienced a lot the last few years and I have a lot to share. So I hope that you'll take a moment to sit back, relax and enjoy the words I've put together for you in this book. I think you'll find I've left no stone unturned, no door unopened, no window unbroken, no rug unvacuumed, no ivories untickled. What I'm saying is, let us begin, shall we? |
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“This book is ridiculously hilarious, and makes my father look like a normal member of society.” —Chelsea Handler “Read this unless you’re allergic to laughing.” —Kristen Bell “If you’re wondering if there is a real man behind the quotes on Twitter, the answer is a definite and laugh-out-loud yes.” —Christian Lander, New York Times bestselling author of Stuff White People Like Tuesdays with Morrie meets F My Life in this hilarious book about a son’s relationship with his foul-mouthed father by the 29-year-old comedy writer who created the massively popular Twitter feed of the same name. |
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NEW YORK TIMES  BESTSELLER •  In this hilarious instant classic, the  creator of  The Mindy Project  and  Never Have I Ever  invites readers on a tour of her life and her unscientific observations on romance, friendship, and Hollywood. “[Kaling is] like Tina Fey’s cool little sister. Or perhaps . . . the next Nora Ephron.”— The New York Times   Mindy Kaling has lived many lives: the obedient child of immigrant professionals, a timid chubster afraid of her own bike, a Ben Affleck–impersonating Off-Broadway performer and playwright, and, finally, a comedy writer and actress prone to starting fights with her friends and coworkers with the sentence “Can I just say one last thing about this, and then I swear I’ll shut up about it?”    Perhaps you want to know what Mindy thinks makes a great best friend (someone who will fill your prescription in the middle of the night), or what makes a great guy (one who is aware of all elderly people in any room at any time and acts accordingly), or what is the perfect amount of fame (so famous you can never get convicted of murder in a court of law), or how to maintain a trim figure (you will not find that information in these pages). If so, you’ve come to the right book, mostly!   With several conveniently placed stopping points for you to run errands and make phone calls, Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? proves that Mindy Kaling really is just a Girl Next Door—not so much literally anywhere in the continental United States, but definitely if you live in India or Sri Lanka.   Praise for  Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? “Where have you been all our lives, Mindy?” — Glamour “Who wouldn’t want to hang out with Mindy Kaling? . . . [ Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? ] is like a mash note to comedy nerds.” — Time Out New York “Very funny.” — Boston Globe |
