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AN INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER BE NO MAN'S PEACE. Have you ever been badgered by an annoying pick-up artist at the bar? Ever felt a burning desire to emotionally torture a friend’s boyfriend in an act of revenge? Have you ever endured just talking to a man before? If so, then this book is for you. With more than 100 phrases, questions, and comebacks, How to Piss Off Men is your essential guide to sending even the most relentless mansplainer into an existential crisis. Whether it’s referring to his expensive NFL jersey as “cosplay” or letting him know he has the confidence of a much taller man, this handbook will ensure you’re equipped to combat toxic masculinity in any situation.* * The advice in this book has been thoroughly tested for effectiveness. Even on the author, bless his heart. |
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Qui ne connaît les Schtroumpfs ? Ces gentils lutins bleus à gros bonnet blanc se ressemblent tous, même s'ils ont chacun leur caractère, et parlent une curieuse langue dans laquelle la plupart des mots sont remplacés par schtroumpf ou schtroumpfer. Sous l'autorité débonnaire du grand Schtroumpf, ce sympathique petit peuple organise sa vie et lutte contre l'abominable sorcier Gargamel, qui ne rêve que de les détruire. Une adorable fantaisie qui séduira les plus petits et distraira leurs aînés. |
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Now available for the first time as an e-book! In Attack of the Deranged Mutant Killer Monster Snow Goons, Calvin suffers a host of hardships. He gets attacked by his new two-wheeler bike. Hobbes gets kidnapped by Susie, a slimy girl. His father cancels Calvin's personal TV network. Self-multiplying deranged mutant killer monster snow goons threaten to take over the yard. And if that wasn't enough, the ethicated duplicate of Calvin's good side wreaks havoc with his reputation by doing good deeds. Yet Calvin conquers all with his irrepressible spirit and a little help from alter-egos Spaceman Spiff, Stupendous Man, and Tracer Bullet, private eye. Readers are delighted by Calvin's resourceful wit, which applies to everything from philosophical speculations to attempts to outsmart his parents. |
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The bestselling book on the art of the insult is back and it’s more blasphemous than ever. Author and snark connoisseur Lawrence Dorfman does his absolute worst, dishing out hundreds of clever insults for all situations and occasions. From careful instructions on how and when to throw a verbal punch to an expertly curated collection of the best insults in history, this uproarious little book has everything you need to become the ultimate slanderer. Every page is packed with delightfully mean one-liners for swiftly scorning your foes: “You’re not yourself today. I noticed the improvement immediately.” “You started at the bottom, and it’s been downhill ever since.” “His men would follow him anywhere but it was only out of morbid curiosity.” “Perhaps your whole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.” “You fill a much-needed gap.” Complete with charming black and white drawings that complement the book’s verbal spars, The Snark Handbook: Insult Edition proves that the pen truly is mightier than the sword, and will ensure you’re never again without the perfect quip or comeback. |
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NATIONAL BESTELLER Like  On Tyranny,  but   with cats, this is the ultimate guide to channeling feline wisdom in the face of authoritarian nonsense.   Cats, the original masters of stealth, sass, and strategic chaos, have been teaching us survival tactics for centuries—they just haven’t been this explicit about it. Until now.   Through humor, sharp insights, and unapologetic defiance, LESSONS FROM CATS FOR SURVIVING FASCISM lays out eleven essential cat-inspired strategies for resisting control and reclaiming power. From staying nimble and unpredictable to demanding what you need with the confidence of a hungry tabby, each chapter is packed with lessons that are as subversive as they are practical.   Whether you’re facing off against a system that thrives on control or just trying to make sense of a chaotic world, these lessons will arm you with the tools—and the attitude—you need to fight back. Cats don’t ask for permission, and neither should you. |
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AN INSTANT #1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER A #1 TORONTO STAR BESTSELLER AN INSTANT USA TODAY AND INDIE BESTSELLER  A GLOBE AND MAIL BESTSELLER From one of the hottest stand-up comedians, Nate Bargatze brings his everyman comedy to the page in this hilarious collection of personal stories, opinions, and confessions.  Nate Bargatze used to be a genius. That is, until the summer after seventh grade when he slipped, fell off a cliff, hit his head on a rock, and “my skull got, like, dented or something.” Before this accident, he dreamed of being “an electric engineer, or a doctor that does brain stuff, or a math teacher who teaches the hardest math on earth.” Afterwards, all he could do was stand-up comedy.* But the “brain stuff” industry’s loss is everyone else’s gain because Nate went on to become one of today’s top-grossing comedians, breaking both attendance and streaming records.  In his highly anticipated first book, Nate talks about life as a non-genius. From stories about his first car (named Old Blue, a clunky Mazda with a tennis ball stick shift) and his travels as a Southerner (Northerners like to ask if he believes in dinosaurs), to tales of his first apartment where he was almost devoured by rats and his many debates with his wife over his chores, his diet, and even his definition of “shopping.” He also reflects on such heady topics as his irrational passion for Vandy football and the mysterious origins of sushi (how can a California roll come from old-time Japan?).  BIG DUMB EYES is full of heart. It will make readers laugh out loud and nod in recognition, but it probably won’t make them think too much. *Nate’s family disputes this entire story.  |
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After nearly a lifetime spent in the Industry, author and fashion insider Simon Doonan is ready to let you in on a little secret: his peers in this multibillion-dollar industry are just as nutty as the denizens of your local loony bin. In The Asylum , an unabashedly hilarious collection of autobiographical essays, Doonan, the creative ambassador for Barneys New York, tells the real-life stories of glamorous madness and stylish insanity.   Doonan has witnessed models unable to work for fear of ghosts, gone deep-sea fishing with a couturier pal and his jailbird companion, and watched Anna Wintour remain perfectly calm while the ceiling fell—literally—in the middle of Fashion Week. Once you start looking, he says, you’ll notice telltale signs of lunacy everywhere. Style insiders see patterns and trends in everything; they suffer from outsize personality disorders and delusions of grandeur; and of course, they have a predilection for theatrical makeup and artfully destroyed clothing. No one is more suited to the asylum than the truly die-hard fashionista—after all, eccentricity and extremism are the foundations of great style. With his gimlet eye for the absurd and a love for eccentricity, Doonan’s personal and professional stories never fail to entertain. “The David Sedaris of the style universe” ( The Boston Globe ) gives us the scoop on the kooky, cutthroat—but always fabulous—fashion world, and proves himself one of the sharpest humorists writing today. |
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From  Vanderpump Rules star and fashion designer Kristen Doute, and coauthor of How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days , Michele Alexander, comes the ultimate, hilarious guide to embracing your "crazy" and never giving up on love. Unpacking the ups and downs of Kristen's laugh-out-loud funny, sometimes cringe-worthy dating history, He's Making You Crazy will hold your hand through deep self-reflection—while giving you that push to put on your detective's hat and hack your man's email account if you need to. From trapping your boyfriend in ridiculous lies to gathering all your crush's security question answers on the first date, Kristen shares her no-holds-barred, hysterically funny and hard-earned advice on men, love, and modern dating. He's Making You Crazy will give you the motivation you need to get out of that unhealthy relationship (that one that is making you crazy!) and, like Kristen, to keep your heart open through it all. |
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Hop into this uplifting little book, filled with positive affirmations on self-love and empowerment, as told by the internet's beloved mushroom frog "Don't forget about the subtle magic that is happening all around you every day" Meet the little frog! With its mushroom cap and endless collection of fabulous footwear, this adorable amphibian is here to be your new best friend. Whether you need an emotional boost, some friendly encouragement or an honest view on the world, the little frog will be your guide. Created by the California-based artist Maybell Eequay, this book is a perfect compassionate gift for yourself or others. Inside you will find: - Over 40 hand-drawn illustrations of the little frog - Beautiful life lessons and empowering reminders that it's okay to be gentle with yourself and to feel your feelings - A humorous, no-nonsense approach to positivity These illustrations will fill your heart with love for yourself and others, and remind you that it's brave and wonderful of you to exist! |
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The newest Sarah's Scribbles collection from New York Times bestselling author and Goodreads Choice award winner Sarah Andersen. The fourth book in the enormously popular graphic novel series, the latest collection of Sarah's Scribbles comics explores the evils of procrastination, the trials of the creative process, the cuteness of kittens, and the beauty of not caring about your appearance as much as you did when you were younger. When it comes to humorous illustrations of the awkwardness and hilarity of millennial life, Sarah's Scribbles is without peer. |
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With new and classic Sarah's Scribbles comics, essays, and more, this book is a celebration of one of the best loved comic voices of a generation. With 100 comics, 15 essays, and dozens of photos and sketches, the fifth Sarah's Scribbles book offers a rare look behind the creative process of one of the most original and beloved comic artists of a generation. A comedic companion to her first book, the bestselling Adulthood is a Myth , the artwork and writing in Adulthood is a Gift! is a celebration of the many experiences and life lessons the author has picked up in her decade of making viral, relatable, and award-winning comics and books.   |
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Now a Netflix Original Series - BOOTS Based on the memoir The Pink Marine In The Pink Marine , Greg Cope White's sharp, funny, and unexpectedly moving memoir, he recounts how an insecure New Orleans weakling transforms into a Devil Dog Marine. A coming-of-age story set in the most unlikely place: boot camp. When Greg's straight best friend Dale tells him he's spending the summer at Marine Corps boot camp on Parris Island, all Greg hears is "summer" and "camp." So, he signs up too. Never mind that he's underweight, out of shape - and gay, which is illegal in the U.S. military at the time. Yes, it's insanely dangerous for both of them. But as fate would have it, the Few and the Proud turn out to be a bunch of oddballs and eccentrics - and a brotherhood is born. In a world where the landmines are both literal and metaphorical, this book takes a hard - and hilarious - look at masculinity and what it really means to belong. "An inspiring memoir that displays a balanced, surprisingly reverent view of the Marine Corps and military service." - Kirkus Reviews Greg's chaotic childhood hasn't prepared him for military life. He packs five suitcases for thirteen weeks of training. The U.S. Marines strip him of all of it, shave his head, and put a rifle in his hands. At first, he struggles to keep up - afraid that his secret will be discovered. But as the weeks go by, the desire to survive and earn the title of Marine triumphs over fear. He learns that everyone enters the Corps feeling different - judged for the color of their skin, their weight, or their past. Some even choose boot camp over jail. This will push every man past his limit and strip away who he thinks he is. What breaks them also binds them. Nobody comes out the same. Something shifts for Greg. For everyone. Told with disarming honesty and biting wit, The Pink Marine follows Greg and his new brothers as they navigate the brutal system of recruit training. Greg must prove he belongs - and figure out who he really is. While I served in the military, the Air Force was a social club compared to the Marines. I've known Greg Cope White for some thirty years, and have admired him every minute throughout. That he could write as intriguing and honest a book as The Pink Marine is no surprise. Norman Lear The Pink Marine is a beautifully detailed passionately written and very necessary book—it's the fascinating and surprising story of a gay man in the military, told with respect, wit and insight. Paul Rudnick A great story beautifully told-surprising, funny, courageous and inspiring. David Hyde Pierce Greg is as inspirational as he is hilarious--I love this book!   Margaret Cho , Comedienne  White recalls the grueling yet confidence-building three-month Marine Corps boot camp training he endured as a still-closeted teenager in 1979. "I learned that I had to respect myself if I wanted others to respect me." The author demonstrates that respect and delivers a heartening coming-of-age story, an inspiring memoir that displays a balanced, surprisingly reverent view of the Marine Corps and military service.   Kirkus Reviews   This is the story of how, through pure gumption, a most unlikely Marine candidate rises to the occasion to show his true colors! Jane Lynch,  Actress   |
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Part history lesson. Part sacrilege. An entirely good time. Think you have what it takes to be a saint? Lucky for you, thousands of souls have paved the way to heaven—creating a clear formula for getting the job done while also leaving a rich, disturbing history behind them. And in just five easy-ish steps, you can learn how to secure your own halo! But even if the whole “dying and becoming a saint” thing doesn’t appeal to you, the bizarrely bureaucratic process of canonization is still guaranteed to delight and entertain. How to Be Saint is a compulsively readable and endlessly entertaining ride through Catholicism for anyone who enjoys their history with a side of comedy. From flying friars to severed heads, this book explores the wild lives (and deaths) of saints and pulls the curtain back on the oddest quirks of religious doctrine. Whether you’re a lifelong Catholic or a weird-history enthusiast, How to Be a Saint is your ultimate guide to understanding the hilarious, fascinating, and shockingly true history of sainthood. |
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"A laugh-out-loud 80-page personal history with heart, grit and a galaxy of stars," the perfect gift for a Texas woman or new transplant to the state ( Austin American-Statesman ) What is it that distinguishes Texas women—the famous Yellow Rose and her descendants? Is it that combination of graciousness and grit that we revere in first ladies Laura Bush and Lady Bird Johnson? The rapier-sharp wit that Ann Richards and Molly Ivins used to skewer the good ole boy establishment? The moral righteousness with which Barbara Jordan defended the US constitution? An unnatural fondness for Dr Pepper and queso? In her inimitable style, Sarah Bird pays tribute to the Texas woman in all her glory and all her contradictions. She humorously recalls her own early bewildered attempts to understand Lone Star gals, from the big-haired, perfectly made-up ladies at the Hyde Park Beauty Salon to her intellectual, quinoa-eating roommates at Seneca House Co-op for Graduate Women. After decades of observing Texas women, Bird knows the species as few others do. A Love Letter to Texas Women is a must-have guide for newcomers to the state and the ideal gift to tell any Yellow Rose how special she is.   "In her trademark bitingly funny style, Bird talks about her journey from granola hippydom in New Mexico to the Aqua-Netted friendliness of Texas, and how she learned to love it. Great stories and quotes from greats such as the late Ann Richards and Lady Bird Johnson to everyday ladies getting their hair set in small towns." ― San Antonio Express-News |
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Bah! Humbug! It’s that time of year again….Time to spend too much, drink too much, eat too much, smile falsely, dig down deep to try and find “good cheer,” battle crowds, try to find parking in over-crowded lots, ignore surly clerks, bartenders, waiters, valets, and parking lot attendants, all in the pursuit of that moment of happiness known throughout the world as…dun, dun, dun: the Holidays. Has there ever been a time more suited to tapping into snark? With commentary, jokes, and quotes regarding Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza, New Year’s; on bad presents, worse in-laws, horrible children, and much more glorious excess. Enjoy such rotten sugar plums as:      • “Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people once a year.”—Victor Borge      • “If someone screws up on their gift, there are seven more days to correct it...No awkward explanations of virgin birth...No Irving Berlin songs.”—Among the Top Ten Reasons to Love Hanukkah      • “What I don’t like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.”—Phyllis Diller Snark, the Herald Angels Sing is destined to be a holiday classic. |
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Even you can get your sh*t together! Tidy the F*ck Up is a funny, down-to-earth parody of Marie Kondo’s The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up , where you’ll be handed the most useful tools for keeping your crap clean and organized without all the pressure.    In this book, you’ll discover useful ways to figure out what to do with your sh*tpiles in an approachable, care-free way, and you’ll say farewell to the hair-pulling stress of marathon cleaning. Tossing all your junk in a closet doesn’t make it any less of a clusterf*ck, but approaching it little by little and making use of some helpful hints can do a world of wonders for all your sh*t, the comfort of your space, and your general sanity. With this hilarious guide, you’ll learn how to: • Become a decision-making bad*ss • Get rid of the sh*t you don’t need and keep the sh*t you do • Live life after a clusterf*ck! • And more! With a lighthearted tone that the finest sailors would admire, Tidy the F*ck Up will help you make your house a f*cking home . |
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Wild, dangerous, and flat-out unbelievable, here is the incredible #1 bestselling memoir of the Canadian actor, gambler, and raconteur, and one of the greatest stand-up comedians of all time. A Globe and Mail Best Book of the Year As this book’s title suggests, Norm Macdonald tells the story of his life—more or less—from his origins on a farm in the backwoods of Ontario and an epically disastrous appearance on Star Search to his account of auditioning for Lorne Michaels and his memorable run as the anchor of Weekend Update on Saturday Night Live—until he was fired because a corporate executive didn’t think he was funny. But Based on a True Story is much more than just a memoir; it’s the hilarious, inspired epic of Norm’s life. In dispatches from a road trip to Las Vegas (part of a plan hatched to regain the fortune he’d lost to sports betting and other vices) with his sidekick and enabler, Adam Eget, Norm recounts the milestone moments, the regrets, the love affairs, the times fortune smiled on his life, and the times it refused to smile. As the clock ticks down, Norm’s debt reaches record heights, and he must find a way to evade the hefty price that’s been placed on his head by one of the most dangerous loan sharks in the country. As a comedy legend should, Norm peppers these pages with classic jokes and long-mythologized Hollywood stories. This wildly adventurous, totally original, and absurdly funny saga turns the conventional “comic’s memoir” on its head and gives the reader an exclusive pass inside the mad, glorious mind of Norm Macdonald. |
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NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • “This book is the inspirational story that we all need. No one makes me laugh harder than Leanne Morgan!”—Reese Witherspoon Look for Leanne Morgan’s new sitcom, Leanne, and her hit standup special, I’m Every Woman, both available on Netflix. The beloved comedy sensation packs a hilarious punch with real talk about what it’s like to be a woman today—from rebelling against the latest diet trends to dealing with perimenopausal mean girls and attending rock concerts in middle age. For a long time, no one pulling the strings in the comedy world thought that a woman over fifty from rural Tennessee could make it in the industry. But Leanne Morgan has defied the odds, reaching millions with her musings on hormones, low-rise britches, Weight Watchers, and her opposites-attract relationship with her husband, Chuck. In her charming southern accent, Morgan brings readers inside her quest to find her voice after spending many years trying to figure out what that meant. Along the way, we learn how she grew up as a butcher’s daughter, landed a husband with health insurance, honed her stand-up technique selling jewelry at house parties, embraced the glories of aging, and surrendered to the comfort of wearing big flesh-toned panties. Equal parts warm and hilarious, this book is a must-read by one of comedy’s brightest stars—reminding you that every time life leaves you asking “What in the world?!,” something good is bound to come out of it someday. |
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David Sedaris, the “champion storyteller,” ( Los Angeles Times ) returns with his first new collection of personal essays since the bestselling Calypso Back when restaurant menus were still printed on paper, and wearing a mask—or not—was a decision made mostly on Halloween, David Sedaris spent his time doing normal things. As Happy-Go-Lucky opens, he is learning to shoot guns with his sister, visiting muddy flea markets in Serbia, buying gummy worms to feed to ants, and telling his nonagenarian father wheelchair jokes.   But then the pandemic hits, and like so many others, he’s stuck in lockdown, unable to tour and read for audiences, the part of his work he loves most. To cope, he walks for miles through a nearly deserted city, smelling only his own breath. He vacuums his apartment twice a day, fails to hoard anything, and contemplates how sex workers and acupuncturists might be getting by during quarantine.   As the world gradually settles into a new reality, Sedaris too finds himself changed. His offer to fix a stranger’s teeth rebuffed, he straightens his own, and ventures into the world with new confidence. Newly orphaned, he considers what it means, in his seventh decade, no longer to be someone’s son. And back on the road, he discovers a battle-scarred America: people weary, storefronts empty or festooned with Help Wanted signs, walls painted with graffiti reflecting the contradictory messages of our time: Eat the Rich. Trump 2024. Black Lives Matter.   In Happy-Go-Lucky, David Sedaris once again captures what is most unexpected, hilarious, and poignant about these recent upheavals, personal and public, and expresses in precise language both the misanthropy and desire for connection that drive us all. If we must live in interesting times, there is no one better to chronicle them than the incomparable David Sedaris. |
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Named one of Us Weekly ’s Best Celebrity Memoirs of 2022 The New York Times bestselling author of Next Level Basic and fan-favorite alumna of Bravo’s Vanderpump Rules returns with the definitive Basic Bitch handbook for surviving your rock-bottom moments. The year 2020 was going to be the best year of Stassi’s life. Besides getting engaged and feeling like she was on top of the world career-wise, she bought her first house and was planning her dream Italian wedding. The future showed so much freaking promise—until it all went to hell. Stassi may not be perfect—she may have made some (major) mistakes—but she does feel like she has some insight (and plenty of hilarious tales) about getting knocked up, called out, and learning from what went wrong. Through stories, confessions, illustrations, and plenty of self-reflection and self-deprecation, this new book goes behind the scenes and addresses the experience of getting cancelled, getting that positive pregnancy test, and saying “I do” in the backyard instead of in Italy. Stassi won’t hold back about her transformation from proud basic bitch to... proud basic bitch who has a deeper appreciation for what’s really important in life: love, relationships, mutual respect, and, okay fine, an Aperol spritz and some showtunes when you need them most. Stassi hopes her story will help others see the light at the end of the tunnel in their own lives and make them laugh along the way. She writes about the importance of having a good cry (at work, in the shower, in your closet), ways to navigate social media responsibly (sometimes that means logging the eff off when crowds are chanting, “OFF WITH HER HEAD”), how to practice self-care when wine is not an option, and how not to become a Bridezilla—plus she’ll offer tips on marrying your f*ckboy, embracing pregnancy sweats (both cashmere sweats and night sweats), and styling baby OOTDs. So roll up your bedazzled sleeves…or the sleeves of the tattered robe you’ve been wearing nonstop because you’re at rock bottom; grab a cocktail; and let your favorite (more evolved) basic bitch take you on a wild ride inside the bumpiest year of her life. |
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A perfectly gift-able, perfectly cynical, slipcased omnibus of George Carlin's trademark irreverence--including bonus never-before-published material. For four decades, George Carlin has been one of America's favorite comics, known as much for his willingness to take on taboo subjects as for his absurdist wordplay. As an author, he has proved equally popular: With combined sales of more than two million copies, Carlin's three books of razor-sharp and hilarious observations have topped bestseller lists nationwide. Now, just in time for the holidays, Hyperion proudly collects all three volumes -- When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops? , Napalm and Silly Putty , and Brain Droppings -- into one hilarious omnibus, a slipcased edition that also includes new material. |
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No one knows what they're doing - why should you?! Google doesn't have the answer Dream big, plan small When in doubt, Helvetica Assumption is the mother of all fuck ups Stay curious In this straight-talking guide to the real world of work, discover genuinely useful advice that will help you find the confidence to go for that promotion, quit your job, break into that industry, nail that pitch or climb over a creative brick wall. With 120 irreverent, unusual but always useful insights, this book will help you reach your career goals. |
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Hey -- you there with the cheap chardonnay -- you think you know how to drink, but this book will gently lead you to the conclusion that you do, indeed, suck at drinking. It's time to imbibe correctly , and author Matthew Latkiewicz has compiled this helpful, wryly humorous guide to help you navigate any drinking situation and answer any pedantic questions, including: * What's the difference between a flip, a fizz, and a smash? * What is the official state term for being inebriated in Iowa? * How do you choose the right drink to suit any occasion? And much more! Complete with tons of helpful illustrations and handy graphs, this guide will become indispensable to anyone who no longer wants to -- suck at drinking. |
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Spirited and whip-smart, these laugh-out-loud autobiographical essays are "a masterpiece" from the Emmy Award-winning actress and comedy writer known for 30 Rock, Mean Girls, and SNL" ( Sunday Telegraph ). Before Liz Lemon, before "Weekend Update," before "Sarah Palin," Tina Fey was just a young girl with a dream: a recurring stress dream that she was being chased through a local airport by her middle-school gym teacher. She also had a dream that one day she would be a comedian on TV. She has seen both these dreams come true. At last, Tina Fey's story can be told. From her youthful days as a vicious nerd to her tour of duty on Saturday Night Live ; from her passionately halfhearted pursuit of physical beauty to her life as a mother eating things off the floor; from her one-sided college romance to her nearly fatal honeymoon -- from the beginning of this paragraph to this final sentence. Tina Fey reveals all, and proves what we've always suspected: you're no one until someone calls you bossy. Includes Special, Never-Before-Solicited Opinions on Breastfeeding, Princesses, Photoshop, the Electoral Process, and Italian Rum Cake! |
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“This book is ridiculously hilarious, and makes my father look like a normal member of society.” —Chelsea Handler “Read this unless you’re allergic to laughing.” —Kristen Bell “If you’re wondering if there is a real man behind the quotes on Twitter, the answer is a definite and laugh-out-loud yes.” —Christian Lander, New York Times bestselling author of Stuff White People Like Tuesdays with Morrie meets F My Life in this hilarious book about a son’s relationship with his foul-mouthed father by the 29-year-old comedy writer who created the massively popular Twitter feed of the same name. |
